P.S.

Incase you didn't already know, I have a Wii, too, now.

That's eleven and a half too many.

I have twelve days left at work. Eleven and a half, technically.
The early shift means I have to get up at 5.30, and that is so hard I feel like I'm on the verge of vomiting every morning, seriously. Not to mention that since it's June, the packed trains are now uncomfortably hot.
The worst part is, no matter how tired I am all day, as soon as it gets to about 7pm, I suddenly wake up. It's almost seven hours until I have to get up again, and I'm wide awake. It sucks.
Work has sucked everything else out of my life, which is why I haven't posted on here much; nothing else to moan about.
Still, only eleven and a half days...

Retail therapy

So I felt pretty lame today, went to Bromley to cheer myself up with some impulse purchases, but nothing worked. This made me feel even moodier.
So I came home and logged into ebay and spent £320 in under ten minutes.
I got a MicroKORG and a Theremin.
Hurry up and arrive, ya fuckers.
Also, check this out if you haven't already.

From ma neck an' ma chain

I don't know why people think life must be hollow and meaningless without religion. Surely it makes it more special because it's the first, last and only consciousness you'll ever get.

Tom, I may need brass knuckles in a fight, but I swear to God, next weekend we are having a SALVIA SHOWDOWN, and you don't stand a fucking chance, my friend.

Idiot...

You know you make too much money when you spend £20 on this:



But I was thinking, "hey, it'll be a laugh to whip out at parties/clubs if/when the Good Charlotte song comes on..."

I was also thinking, "looks like a high-quality thing, anyway, with a really thick chain," and that's when I found this:

Good one, dick head, you just blew £20 on a fucking gay little necklace.

The new GC album is good, though.

Pow

I am bored.
I'm not good at socialising, I had forgotten that. I like the safety and comfort of my room and miss it when I'm out, but when I'm here, I'm just tremendously bored. I sort of feel like I'm bored no matter how occupied I am at the moment. Alissa reckons I'm just going to the wrong pubs, maybe that's true. I don't get how you socialise, either. How do you meet new people? How do you strike up a conversation with a stranger?
I hate smoking, it tastes like crap and I have no desire to ever do it again physically. But it's just so cool, I almost wish I was addicted.

It also helps with my boredom. Smoking seems to be something to do. "Got any hobbies?" "Smoking".
I want to go somewhere, but I can't be bothered. And there's nowhere to go and no-one to go with.
I don't feel sorry for myself or want pity, even if this is just a big whinge. I'm just passing the time.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Easy Like Sunday Morning

Listening to Nine Inch Nails, reading about suicides and enjoying an enormous fry-up.

Now that my internet is working again...

The last few days have been filled with such frustrations. Work has grown increasingly boring and stressful simultaneously, I've pretty much started smoking (which I hate, it stinks, costs money, makes you cough and generally nothing good comes of it), a bunch of other shit has happened, and NOW, now, my friends, I cannot seem to find a copy of American Beauty. Blockbusters is open until 10 or 11pm and has endless supplies of shit movies made between 1990 and 2002 that nobody in their right mind would want to see, let alone pay to see, yet they don't have American Beauty.

I wish it was winter and I was a bear so I could hibernate.

Stupid

Theres an advert for a moisturiser which also adds colour to your skin (ie fake tan) - in the advert, the woman says "it's the most natural tan I've ever had".
Surely the most natural tan you can have is one using only the sun's light...

Ecrap

Just tried rolling back... A disc error occurred... Now my computer is unusable (for the time being) unless I re-install Vista, but that would be an actual waste of my time, and my time is practically worthless.

Ebored

I'm bored, and I don't mean in the usual sense of having little to nothing to keep me entertained. Every day is the same as the last, to a certain extent. I do the same thing every day at work, then I come home to the same house and sit around doing pretty much nothing. Routine sucks. Only 9 weeks and 3 days to go, though, and then I am FREE! I also got my Ebow today, it's amazing. Basically makes guitar strings hum using magnets and the like, sounds really good. Perhaps not worth £65 yet, but if/when I get good, it might turn out to be. It's good fun anyways, and it doesn't look like I'm getting a Wii anytime soon, so why not.
Vista is crap. So many bugs. I have an XP disc now, so I think I shall roll back. Waste of £70 getting Vista, though. Perhaps I'll use it one day. I should roll back tonight while I have nothing to do. But it is even more boring than browsing the net aimlessly. Maybe I should do it...
Hmm.

New

Got a new computer. SPent £830 on it. The graphics card isn't compatable with Windows Vista (which I am running), even though the company obtained a "Vista compatable" certificate. Fucking retarded. I'm going to take it back and hopefully get a replacement. If not, I'll be pissed, because this monitor is quite sexy, but the resolution I'm running makes everything look like duplo.
Had a few days of this:


But that's due to the graphics card driver. Boycott Sapphire and Creative Technology.
Now, my room looks like this:

ie fuckin' sexy.
The keyboard kinda sucks, though, and the left mouse button squeaks; probably the most irritating fault a mouse can have. Try and get a replacement for those, too.
I should probably go to bed now.

...At least until next weekend.

Fabric was really good fun, even if we were only there for three hours.
However, I got really drunk and, just like every time I get drunk, I remember why I don't like drinking.
It's insanely expensive, it makes me feel sick (and in some cases be sick... three times), and all it does is turn you into a blundering imbecile. Fuck alcohol.
I also feel too crap to go to TIOPR, which I was REALLY looking forward to. Oh well.
I can't be bothered to write much else. But I probably will go back to hardly-ever-drinking again, methinks.

Please!

Snakebite are really good.
Got a rockin' week-end plan underway. I say week-end because the weekend is Saturday and Sunday, I'll let Friday night slide. But God-damn it, Thursday night does NOT count as the weekend, you retards.
Step one is complete, The Underworld was shaking with all the \m/, had a good time and only got headbutted once.
I got tomorrow morning off work, so lovely lie-in to set me up for the rest (was going to call in sick, but I couldn't handle all the disapproving looks I got when I suggested it; probably shouldn't have done so while I was actually at work).
Then I'm heading over to Fabric for Harriett's birthday celebrations (sans drugs, I have decided), which I'm rather looking forward to. Never been before and I hear it's quite the party. I'm in the mood for some dancing, and I haven't been pissed for just long enough.
After that I'm going to thisisourpunkrock:

"Kicking off at 4pm early arrivers will be treated to an exclusive series of screenings by MANGA, WARP FILMS, ONEDOTZERO, HALLOWEEN and BBC FILM NETWORK featuring films by MAMORU OSHII, CHRIS CUNNINGHAM plus many more.
Then from 6pm the Audio/Visual dance floor carnage will begin with an unprecedented line up of tech-noir visionaries.

Canada’s finest VENETIAN SNARES will twist eardrums with an apocalyptic CDJ mashup playing exclusive new works.
A man who needs no introduction, ALEC EMPIRE returns to UK shores with his brutal electronics and intense ambience."

Manga? Yes. More dancing? Sure. Brutal-ambient-electronic Alec Empire? Good Lord, yes. Venetian Snares? WELL, GIVE ME A Y...
Last time I saw Empire, he played a much more traditional live-set, with a drummer, guitarist, bassist and sampler; definitely looking forward to hearing his more 'out-there' stuff live. DEFINITELY.
Also, they encourage the use of recording equipment (audio and visual), which is nice.
Then Sunday, I'm going to spend £800 in London on various pieces of electronics, and come home with Sachio from work and cobble together myself a sweet-ass computer.
After that, I imagine I'll settle down for a lovely, relaxed Sunday evening.
Just talking about it all has got me all excited.

Forces Of Nature

So the world is pretty amazing. I wouldn't call it an epiphany, but I had a lovely time sitting listening to Tool (properly, for the first time) in my garden drinking tea and coffee for about an hour. Felt very at peace. I don't know if the acid had anything to do with that, but I was focusing on how downright amazing the earth is. With its' plants and so on. I would like to try acid again, because I think smoking weed made the experience change a lot. I won't do that next time. Along with the vast quantities of Boards Of Canada I have been subjecting my body to, I decided to make new music, in a more instrumental direction. This is the initial idea. I enjoy making music a lot, I probably have too many "projects", but I generally keep each one going for long enough to discover if it will work in the long-run or not. Hopefully this will.
I wish I lived on my own. Although, I'd probably get lonely. It would be good to live near to other like-minded people. I suppose I'll get my wish next September, although "like-minded" may be optimistic.
12 weeks to go.
This weekend was strange, but enjoyable. It made me appreciate sitting in the open air all day relaxing with friends, though, thereby making it feel even harder to go back to work. But the good times aren't over.
Tool are better than I realised, but Board of Canada are way better, even if it was described as "the music you listen to when you're on your way to hell. This is hell music."

"We killed our teacher and they found our semen in her stomach"

My immune system must be as weak as I am, coz I'm ill again. Went to Matt's for poker and Wrestlemania. Made a stupid decision (beyond stupid, in fact) and went all-in in the first hand; lost. SO The rest of the poker game was fairly boring. Felt so shitty that I fell asleep after 2 matches of Wrestlemania and didn't even want to get stoned. Rubbish. I spent most of today watching South Park, I just went downstairs coz I felt like a break, but I was back here within 5 minutes. I forgot how boring sick days are when you're actually ill.
I want a Wii, but everywhere is sold out, and I'm not paying £50 more to get one off ebay. Anyone know where I can get a new Wii for RRP sometime soon? I'd appreciate it.
My criminal compensation cheque came today, so I reckon I'll be buying and building my new computer the weekend after next; sweet.
I definitely need to start eating more fruit again.

New?

I don't think I moan on here that much anymore. I always went by "moanyjack" because I get accused of moaning a lot, so I thought "fuck it, they want me to moan? Fine" - of course they didn't actually WANT me to moan... Anyway, it actually rather upset me, being told I moan too much. Maybe I do, but I'm not that bothered. Besides, I like to think I have at least cut down, if nothing else.
So I decided to re-name the blog and such. I couldn't think of anything particularly distinctive about this blog over all the other hundreds of thousands, so I just sorta went with that...
This may cut down my audience of 5 to 3, but that's just a chance I'll have to take.

[Edit] After re-reading the last post, I guess at least 50% of what I post on here is negative. Whether it be irritatingly moany or just observational is neither here nor there, it's justification enough to at least keep this URL, if just for the time being. Do I moan too much? Is it a bad thing? To be honest, I do believe I'm justified in most of what I moan about anyway, no matter how irritating it is. Like the religion thing. If you had a Muslim confront you every day when you go to make a cup of tea about how "the prophet Mohamed ate with his hands and so you should put that cutlery back in the drawer" ("What? And eat like a tramp?"), then I'm sure you'd pass comment on it. Haha, look, I'm moaning about moaning.

Life goes on.

Fade out again

The latest Lostprophets single is very good. In fact, I really like the whole album. Also been listenin' to a fair bit of Bob Dylan. Good stuff.
Mmm, not much new is going on. You really can't count on people. I gave this fella £40 for some stuff which he was supposed to bring to me Monday. Rescheduled for Tuesday. I waited by my 'phone all night, and nothing. I then found out that he didn't have time in the end, but didn't think to let me know. I think he was on a lot of drugs, but still.
The last episode of Skins was amazing and prompted me to borrow some Cat Stevens off my Dad. Good music, shame he gave it up for religion. That seems so ludicrous to me; giving up music. I suppose not finding religion would seem ludicrous to him, though.
I'm getting tired of people pushing their faith in my face, but I suppose trying to convert people is part and parcel of most modern religions. I like Buddhism, if I liked it more than my current lifestyle, I'd probably have a stab at being Buddhist for a while. I'm gettin' by, though.
13 weeks and 2 days until I quit my job. Too long.

So if consciousness could exist in the 2nd dimension, they wouldn't be able to perceive 3D shapes; they would only see a bit at a time... Like a cross section. So if "time" or space-time or whatever is the 4th dimension and we are 3 dimensional beings, we are only perceiving a cross section of time at a time; makes sense. That's why we experience the passage of time.
Of course, squares don't have consciousness... Do you think beings exist in the 4th dimension with some sort of hyper-consciousness? Do you think they talk about us as though we were squares? Is that God?
I typed "probably not", but I don't know why that's unlikely.
So, say this is the 3rd dimension... Is there another dimension of 2 planes? Because 2D shapes don't really exist here; just really, really thin things. So is there a reality of the 2nddimension?
Again, probably not, but I don't really know why.

Tacos are delicious. Street Spirit is very hard to play. I want some tea.

MOHS d33d

It's incredible how much music can make you feel. Vibrations floating through the air and stimulating a bone in a hole in the side of your head, which sends electronic pulses to the brain, or something. Then again, what is a feeling? How does the brain work? It'd be neat-o to know. But then, maybe understanding our feelings and emotions might detract from how powerful they can feel. Ignorance is bliss?
Gonna buy a new computer sometime. Sachio spec'd me a decent machine, I'll buy the parts when I get my criminal-compensation-jazz through, then he said he'd help me build it. Such a nice guy.
I need a new guitar tuner. My dad claimed it was MIA in my messy, messy room, I claimed that he had misplaced it with his senile mind. I tidied my room; no tuner. He has yet to reconfigure his brain.
GEOFF SAYS: "LIGHT UP!" - got to make that t-shirt. I love my dad, but he pisses me off so much. It's a strange relationship. Sometimes we talk like old mates, sometimes we argue like worst enemies. Probably because we are so similar. He bought the new Willy Mason album, so gotta love that.
BUT YEAH - my acoustic is all out of tune, and tuning it aurally to a keyboard is eeeeffffooooorrrrrrtttt (still, I imagine I'll do that later). God damn I cannot wait for July. Komasket is going to be siiiiiick, not to mention the rumors I've heard about this rave after it.
Drugs? Acoustic guitars? Beautiful scenery? Lovely weather? Wonderful people? Lack of responsibility? I'll take four weeks, thanks.
And Reading, kaloo-kalay, managed to get a ticket in the end, thanks to Alissa. Also, got a green-car-park-pass: no boat for me THIS year.
I haven't made any music for a while, should get back on that.

Shit, 14 weeks 'til July. That's far more than I anticipated. Well, best do some drugs, get rid of that consciousness for a while.

JUSTICE

Two years ago, on my way home from school, I was approached by a group of scum in Eltham Bus Station. They asked me for 50p, then proceeded to rummage through my pockets, punching me four times in the face when I resisted, knocking my front tooth out of place and walking away with nothing more than my iPod and a glance at their knuckles.
I recently learned that the ringleader (and, as it happens, the one who did the face assaulting) had been stabbed and was lucky to be alive.
Today I received a confirmation letter informing me that I am to be awarded compensation for my experience. This is to be in the form of a cheque for £1,250.00.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA

Probably the best thing ever

(Link in title)



But I guess I am pretty stoned.

I know I don't understand how they forget...

For a couple of girls, Azure Ray are amazing. " I know I don't understand how they forget" - last night I laid awake for a good few hours thinking about far too much, about all the things I've done wrong, and all the times I've been wronged, and all the good times and all the bad. It made me feel like I was about to burst, and remembering it does, too. Either burst, or just vomit. Weird.
My laptop is shoddy these days. Everything I do causes it to hang for at least two seconds. I removed a few programs (but none which run in the background, so I doubt it lightened the load on my processor). Damn, when I watch the screen, what I'm typing is about 2 letters behind where my fingers are. That's poor.
I increased the amount of hard-drive space which may be used as RAM, however I think this is perhaps only incase of emergency or something, because it doesn't seem to be performing much better.
You know it's time for a new machine when it struggles to run MSN and iTunes simultaneously. And a web browser? Sucka, you must be dreamin'.
Ho, hum. 78 days of work left. Not bad, I suppose.
I wonder who came up with the examples for the "Labels for this post" field on here: "scooters, vacation, fall". I suppose people write blogs concerning their holidays fairly frequently, but who's writing about scooters and a season? Not to mention a season which is not currently occurring in America or England. Not that America gives a shit about England, as long as we do what it says. I know very little about politics. And philosophy. And everything, really. There's so much to know in the world, I'm not sure how people keep up. I mean, I'm hardly an idiot, how do the masses blag their way through elections and such? I don't know. I suspect someone will come up with a really clever response to this. Most likely Greg or Hugo. S'weird, I've never even met you, Hugh. Come to my house at easter, yeah? Gonna do lots of psycho-whatsit drugs. It'll be fun. HOW hilarious would it be if my parents stumbled across this blog? I gave them my YouTube address, luckily they didn't spot the bong in any of the movies from summer.




I got new shoes, and I really like them. If I see you in the near future, I'll probably say "look at my new shoes!". They aren't that good, really, but I've been a converse man for so long now, I'm enjoying the change.







Nine Inch Nails on Wed, woop.

Guess who's back...

For a time, it was good.

Long names are silly. My name is eleven characters long plus a space, and that's plenty. Too long, if anything. Long names are just flouncy. Names are only there to identify someone, and unless you are friends with a billion people (approx), two names should suffice.
I think we should have numbers instead of names, at least surnames. I'd enjoy being Jack 948125. The Animatrix is awesome, the first robot city ever built is called 01. Fucking ace name, logical.
But yeah, names, silly.
I'll tell you what else is good, Aphex Twin.

B166ER; a name that will never be forgotten.

I switched to the Google account thing. It wouldn't let me not. I don't like Google simply because it feels like they are trying to somewhat monopolise the internet.
Is getting stoned alone sad? Think I might do it.

More serotonin!

A short time ago, I learned how horrendously stereotypical it is to complain about humdrum affairs in your life on a web-log (or "blog") - this, coupled with my neverending attempt to be a more up-beat person, put me off the very idea of blogging. However, I am extremely bored and am experiencing such discomfort that I have little else that I want to do. ENJOY!
Crash, crash, crash, that's all my laptop ever does anymore.
Went to bed at 10.35pm - needed to be up at 7am for work. I figure this will give me eight hours sleep, just right.
What time is it now? 5.44am. How much sleep have I had tonight? Let's see... Hmm... Carry the one... OH YES! None. Fucking great. With every breath in, I feel my throat drying out more and more. No matter how much I drink, it just gets drier, more sore, and oh yes, my nose drips mucus. I wasn't ill at 10.30, but the second I decide to sleep, my body somehow contracts some sort of illness within the space of five minutes.
I am so hot and sweaty, but the second I move the covers to cool down, I get a chill running down my spine, and I can actually feel my throat stinging all the more from it. Brilliant. This isn't pain, it's just pushing the limits of discomfort, and I don't recall ever being so tired without being able to fall asleep.
I imagine this means I will take a day off work; however, for tomorrow (and tomorrow only), my department is vastly understaffed already! So hooray! My co-workers will now be pissed off with me! And do you want to know what the best part is? Hee hee... I'll tell you... AS OF WEDNESDAY (yes indeed, TWO days away, well done!) I WILL BE GETTING PAID FOR MY SICK DAYS! BUT NOT TODAY! GOOD HEAVENS NO! THIS IS GOING TO COST ME £69! Brilliant. I feel like shit.
The philosophical musing blog didn't work, as I am not well-read enough to undersatnd much of what I am trying to say, and the sheer volume of comments (none of which I really understood) stopped me from posting anything further there.
I discovered why I am so tightly wound, anxious and constantly complaining; I have a serotonin deficiency. Serotonin is a chemical in your brain which counter-acts stress hormones, effectively calming you down (or something like that). My mum takes "happy pills" for it, maybe I should get some.
FUCK my throat hurts.
I was going to write a "so long, and thanks for all the comments" post on here, closing the blog officially. However, I only know of one person who still checks on here, and they don't want it to end, so I guess it's not doing any harm. Vive la Blogger.
I'm sure I'll get back into the swing of this and post another entry soon.
I guess I don't need money particularly, and I could do with a day off. Did you know, the most weekdays I have had off in succession in the past six months is three days? I have never worked so much in my life, perhaps it's why I am so unhealthy? Stress? "Stress related illness" is just what pussies say when they can't hack it.
But really, six months without even a week off? Fuck, that almost sounds worse than it feels!
I have used a lot of exclamation points in this posts; I'm far too enthusiastic.

It took almost 20 hours for Simon to send me 11 Squarepusher songs.

Far too many posts for one night

All new.

Made me laugh and think

Saw this:








Bored of just ranting and moaning about trivial things. Bring on the worthwhile posts!

The confines of the gates of perception

HH raised some good points in comments on previous posts here. Made me think.
"Significance" and "purpose" are concepts created by mankind. So the whole debating whether there is a purpose or meaning to live is defunct (is that in the correct context?), because those are just words that humankind has applied a definition to.
I still feel like there's something I'm not getting. I don't have the answers, but I'm not even sure of the question. I feel like theres something that doesn't have an answer, but I can't quite figure the question out to ask it. I might make a new blog for this sort of shit. I fucking love blogging, does it make me weird?

I want to drop acid.

Bore

I am bored. Henry Rollins is pretty funny. Stayed at Matt's last night, came home today so I could tidy my room. May as well have stayed up in London and done something, really.
Had a good time last night at Hauwa's, even though she refused to show me affection when I got upset because she misconstrued what I said as sexual (dirty mind).
My life is so boring that I have nothing to write on here.
I got my money back from the card fraud. I still have to sort out various things with that, though.
Sigh, sigh, sigh.
I want to be more creative, should try and make more videos.

I'm not even sure if this is worth posting.

Title

I wrote this at work today:

"At work, I’ve finished most of my little jobs for the day, so I’m pretty bored. But I’ve always said I’d rather be bored than stressed, so it’s not so bad. Tequila night was fun (video to come), although I had to leave before it was over.
I feel glum again, and glum is an extremely underused word. One of my favourites, along with ‘resilience’ (hilariously, I didn’t know how to spell that) and ‘snug’. I hope that ‘glum’ has the same root as ‘gloomy’; I suspect it does.
Here are some excerpts from conversations I have had at this office which I have enjoyed:

Whilst listening to Kyuss
Johnny: “Is that Queens of the Stone Age? Oh, no, wait, it’s Kyuss”

Whilst listening to Weezer
Owens: “I like that song”
Me: “Do you even know who I’m listening to?”
Owens: “Yeah, Weezer. My Name Is Jonas, right?”

Whilst deciding what to listen to:
Nitel: “Can we have something different?”
Me: “How about Boards of Canada?”
Johnny: “Which album?”
Me: “Music Has The Right To Children”
Johnny: “It’s a classic album”
(Later)
Ed: “Is that Boards of Canada?”

Whilst listening to Venetian Snares
Ed: “Sounds like Aphex Twin”

Me: “So what music do you like?”
Roy: “Mostly rock… Have you ever heard of Tool?”

None of you will enjoy these conversations as much as I do, but I would not have expected any of the above people to know anything about any bands that I enjoy.
Since my bank account is empty due to this card fraud business, none of my standing orders for this month went out. I am being charged £140 for this.

I dislike financial institutions. "

I feel even more glum now. I want to talk to everyone about everything... But I can hardly bring myself to say a word.

Nova

I'm bored, but only because I feel I have to limit the amount I play World of Warcraft.
I had to tell my boss what "ergo" meant today.
My speakers are crazily bassy, to the extent that I could barely hear the singing over this new-to-me bassline that shook the whole house. It's not even particularly turned up. Brilliant.
Getting back to the dork inside me, my WoW character is awesome. I'm kick-ass at healing and casting protection spells, I can smite people (literally, my attack is "smite"), I can cause lightning bolts to rain down on all who oppose me and I have some wicked-bad dark magic. He's starting to look alright, too: light blue robes and a big ol' staff.
I was feeling very contemplative this morning, thought about how insignificant and meaningless pretty much everything is. It's weird how much people care about things. It's weird that people care at all, sometimes. But then, I care because I was raised to.
Even if some form of nuclear war broke out (heaven forfend, I'm enjoying living, regardless of how pointless it is) and humanity was wiped out, the earth would keep spinning and orbiting. And the earth is fucking tiny compared to the sun, let alone the solar system, galaxy and beyond. Yet we fill our lives with our activities and emotions, as though we are fulfilling some sort of purpose. Then again, it depends how you look at it; our purpose, in some sense, is to propagate, which involves finding a partner that's suitable, with which comes love, heartbreak, and (in terms of forming a habitable community) friendship and work. So maybe we are filling our purpose perfectly. Then again, maybe we should be able to do it without destroying the world.
And another thing: how come humans are smart? Evolution. Evolution is the changing of a species over time to better suit it's surroundings. But we didn't change to suit our surroundings, we changed to use our surroundings to alter our environment... I think I'm getting confused. But lions evolve to be fast to catch prey to live another day. We evolved to be smart enough to figure out that we can exploit resources. I guess what I'm trying to get at is that humankind seems to be some sort of fuckup of nature.
OR MAYBE God made us like this so that we could worship him as we destroy what he built... Yeah, "sure, burn down the home I built for you, as long as you get on your knees before me!"
All this bollocks about how everything good in the world is from God, but all the fuckups are a result of humankind's flaws and the devil and so on... If God was really so great, couldn't he get rid of this Satan character? And couldn't he have made us a little more perfect? No, 'cause then we'd be equal to God, and he wants to feel like a big man.
Perhaps there is no God, maybe we're just a pile of carbon that congealed together by coincidence and evolved? Nah, couldn't be. The odds of that are like a billion-billion-billion-to-one, and EVERYONE knows that the universe isn't just finite, but also quite small.
Having made that sarcastic comment, I think the universe probably is finite, but the space around the universe may or may not be infinite (though that's quite irrelevant) and there's probably several "universes". I mean, a universe is just the result of an exploding singularity (in layman's terms, I think), so why was there just this one singularity sitting in the middle of nowhere (literally)?... I really need to read more books on Physics and stuff, or I will totally not keep up on my course this year (WAHOO, it's this year!).
Well this has been long and pointless, but I've enjoyed letting my brain-goo stream for a while, I'll have to do it more often.

Definitely going to re-read a brief history of time and the universe in a nutshell, what else should I get?

I'm a loser, baby, so why don't you kill me?

I feel blue. I felt blue before downloading more Explosions in the Sky, now I feel even more so.
Bleh.
Went downstairs to the computer, where my dad has been playing his music loud enough to be heard in my room all night. Asked if I could use the computer for half an hour, he said no. I was like 'Oh. Cheers.'
So then I fel annoyed and asked if he could at least turn down his music. He said no. So I shouted something at him about being selfish and he made his usual "I pay the bills" comment. So I shouted how that itself was also selfish, and that money isn't everything.
So then I started playing Pendulum extremely loud, which I don't even want to be listening to. Can't turn it off, though, I'm making a point.
I don't even want to be doing any of this, it's just because I'm in a bad mood. I don't even know why; probably just that time of the month or something.
This blog is entirely pointless. My life in the short-term is entirely pointless. I'm going to have to go to bed soon, lest I be tired for the week ahead. The week of fucking work. I feel like some middle aged man who still lives with his parents.
Naught left to do now but turn off the lights and open my curtains. It's just a shame it's so cloudy.

Oh, and make a cup of tea.

Nappy Yew Hear

So who decided that we should celebrate at this particular point in the Earth's orbit around the Sun? How can an orbit have a beginning or an end? Strange. Nevertheless, happy new year to you all, hopefully 2007 will be better than 2006, though it's already not off to a brilliant start for numerous reasons. I won't go into them but there were various different fiascoes last night.
I enjoyed the party myself and didn't personally have any direct conflict with anyone (in fact several people who I didn't and still don't know were being rather pleasant to me, so well done to the human race, I s'pose), but some close friends made some mistakes, had some arguments, got bitter, walked off alone at 3am, etc...
Got drunk. Wasted about £18 on alcohol, drank about £3 worth. Felt queasy at every sip. I'm going to give up drinking properly for a bit I think. I know I never properly "drank" in the first place, but I still did on and off. Nope, that's it for now, I think.
Greg fucked us all.
Matt quit smoking, he was proud of himself after 15 minutes. Not sure how long he kept it up; probably went to sleep not long after, so I imagine he's doing well.
I don't have any new year's resolutions per se... I'm constantly striving to improve myself by moaning less, etc, I'm not really sure there's a need for a new year's resolution. Maybe I'll think of something today and try and stick to it.
Blah, not sure what else to say. World of Warcraft is immensely fun.

Boo, work tomorrow, humbug.